[Athen] FW: Technology in the Wrong Hands

Jay, Kitty Catherine.L.Jay at nhmccd.edu
Mon Dec 4 06:03:43 PST 2006

Thanks for the good laugh!

Kitty Jay, Extended Learning Center Coordinator


"Look at a man the way that he is, he only becomes worse. But look at
him as if he were what he could be, and then he becomes what he should
be." Goethe


From: athen-bounces at athenpro.org [mailto:athen-bounces at athenpro.org] On
Behalf Of Ron Stewart
Sent: Saturday, December 02, 2006 9:10 AM
To: 'Access Technologists in Higher Education Network'
Subject: [Athen] FW: Technology in the Wrong Hands

A little humor for you

A Montana rancher was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous

when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.

The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban

and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If I tell you

exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me


The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his

peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,
connects it

to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the

Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an

exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite

scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and
exports it

to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image

been processed and the data stored.

He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel

spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and after a few minutes,

a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech,

miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and

"You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the


He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused

the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly

your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why


You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says the cowboy.

"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even

nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to

question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter than me

are; and you don't know a thing about cows...this is a herd of sheep.

Now give me back my dog."

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